Thursday, November 15, 2007

Blogommercial

Ladies and Gentleman! Welcome to our latest edition of "What can possibly be done to save this piece of furniture?" (applause)



I'd like to introduce you to Seth. Here he is holding some beautiful artwork that he colored at his family's dining room table. (oohs! ahhs!)


But folks....wait! We need to let you in on a little secret: He wasn't coloring with Washable Markers (gasp!) He was coloring with permanent markers and it BLED THROUGH the paper onto the table, in multiple locations. (boos!)


His mother rushed to action! She consulted the Internet, googling the phrase "get permanent marker off of furniture." She read about Magic Eraser --"will ruin the finish"-- and nail polish remover --"I don't think so!--. What is our mother to do? (camera pans blog readers with hands over mouths, shaking their heads)


The Internet suggested Antibacterial gel! It had great endorsements. "Won't wreck the finish" and "I am a professional house cleaner. Antibacterial gel gets out every stain."



The oldest daughter (relieved to not be in trouble) suggested Goo Gone! It also had great endorsements: "Remember when I was writing name cards for dinner with a Sharpie and it bled through onto the wood floor and Goo Gone got it off and I was allowed to continue residing in our home?"



Our hero/mother decides to PUT THEM TO THE TEST! (applause!)


Here are the stains before the product is applied. We used Goo Gone on the right and Antibacterial gel on the left.




They were allowed to sit for 5 minutes. Oh wait, 15 minutes, because the Mother had to get her pasta in the oven.

Here are the stains after (oohs!):


We have a winner! (Shouts and applause)

After applying lots of elbow grease...the Mother was able to completely scrub out the stain with Goo Gone(audience nodding and smiling), while the Antibacterial Gel did next to nothing and left a gray residue on the finish that made the mother sick to her stomach with fear (boos!).

She later used Goo Gone on the second stain and it faded a little and restored the finish slightly.

So act fast! DO NOT ALLOW THAT BAD TWO YEAR OLD TO RUIN YOUR HOUSE! Either throw all the permanent markers you have ever owned away:

OR GET GOO GONE!,(camera shows audience throwing their Sharpies into pre-placed wastebaskets, while getting their Albertson's cards out in anticipation of their next shopping purchase.)

Join us next time...cause THERE WILL BE ONE...for "What can possibly be done to save this piece of furniture?" (applause)

25 comments:

Carie said...

You are hilarious!

Am I seriously the first one to post a comment? So this is what it feels like . . .

We have banned markers of any kind in our household. I do have a stash of permanents and will go throw those away now.

Kimberly said...

Very funny (now that it is out), and helpful, too! My 4 year old once drew a very long train track (or at least that is what I thought it was) on our wood floors with a blue Sharpie. For the record, plain old rubbing alcohol got it out with a lot of scrubbing. (I use rubbing alocohol to get out ink on everything, except carpet. Do NOT use on carpet. It will spread, leaving a large light blue mark where was once a tiny blue ink dot.) I'll have to add Goo Gone to the shopping list!

John Holly Levi & Faith said...

Do you think goo gone will get off the candle wax that spilled all over my cute infant car seat? I almost cried!!

This post made me cry too from LAUGHING!!! I love the "commercial" effect. And I love that you got the marker off because you may have been angry at sweet little Seth for years to come every time you looked at your table.

Denae said...

YAY for goo be gone. I love that stuff. You need to dispose of all permanant markers. Good job using you elbow grease. What a relief that it worked!

Me & My BOYS said...

Oh, I so feel your pain!!! I wonder if goo gone would get the marker off the wall from 2 years ago.

Cute post... very creative. You inspire me to try to write creative posts. Maybe some day.

Bridget said...

That was so funny! It's a lifelong dream of mine to be in an info-mercial studio audience and now I feel like I can check that off my list! If only I had known about this Goo Gone stuff.We had permanent marker on our table and my husband ended up sanding it and refinishing. Only took a couple Saturdays to complete. oops. Now we keep our two Sharpies on a very, very high shelf in a very very high cupboard.

zeeny said...

Funny...I guess not really, just a fun telling of it! I too have had permanent marker leak through onto the table. I did use my magic eraser and it got most of it out without damaging my finish. We still have a few spot here and there, good thing the table was from Ikea and I won't feel guilty replacing it someday!

Celia Fae said...

Your creativity is a beacon to all. I think you need to be a broadcast journalism in your next life.

I wonder if Goo Gone would work on the leather in my backseat where it says "Henry."

bloggingchristy said...

I am excited to see you guys at Thanksgiving, I miss you guys already. I'll warn Grandma Nut to stash all the permanent markers when we get there!

Jessica said...

Kimberly...who are you? You are on a couple of blogs, commenting, and it is driving me crazy!

Kara said...

You make me laugh! I'm loving reading your blog. Thanks for telling me about it.

rubberbandgirl said...

I was captivated.
I booed.
I hissed.
I nodded cuz i was told to.
It moved me.

Kenny, Linsey and Caleb said...

I have added Goo Gone to my list of things to acquire on my next trip to the States - miracle cleaning products do not exist outside of the US of A.

I want your pumpkin pie recipe anyway. Maybe someday we'll have enough mouths to warrant a pumpkin pie without my having to eat more than half!

Lisa-Marie said...

Very informative. Just as a commercial should be.

Right this very moment my daughter is begging me for markers. I had to say no, because I am now frightened. Crayons today.

BTW, I have used the Magic Eraser on my table (for permanent marker). It worked like a charm and didn't ruin my finish.

Tiffany said...

Does it work on bed spreads? My Loie is our resident artist! Maybe I just need to pitch the permanent markers.

Paige said...

Genius. I quickly throw away all unwashable markers too, but my kitchen table has been on my "refinishing" list for 2 years. Now I'm thinking it's just going to be "distressed." That Goo stuff is magic.

Kimberly is my very good friend from when we lived in LA and she was in law school. Now she lives in SLC, is a lawyer, and has two adorable boys. She visits me sometimes and I'm happy. She is a faithful blog reader but I have not been able to convince her to start one. Love her. You would too.

Erika said...

you missed you calling in life.... advertising - you could have made millions.

Penny said...

At least it came off. Love the picture of the pens in the trash! Permanent pens are hidden in my house, but maybe I should just chuck them instead! Then I don't have to worry.

Adrianne said...

I first need to endorse Kimberly. She's great, and I know her but she doesn't comment on my blog. I'm not popular enough.

Good job, I will add Goo Gone to my list of "items must import on next trip"

Mark said...

Jessica you could be making money with blog posts like this!

Ellie said...

You have quite the little matisse on your hands. Someday that table will be worth MILLIONS.

Kimberly said...

I feel a tiny bit blogfamous. I apologize, I thought I had introduced myself before commenting willy-nilly on your blog! Paige gave me a full intro. I have considered a blog since I think everything I have to say is very important and others should read it, but am a serious procrastinator so haven't done it. I know Paige from LA, Adrianne from LA and running into her in an odd place in Utah, Ellie from LA, Celia Fae from Paige (although I might have just met her kids and not her), Linsey from my sister's ward in DC (where Adrianne used to be, too), Katie Sue from Sandy, Utah before she was made trampoline-jumping-blog-famous by Celia Fae. I feel right in the middle but with no blog. And I love your blog, and cry with laughter over many of your posts (especially the instructional video). So, howdy!

gab said...

hahaha! I need goo gone. NOW!

Karen said...

Very funny post. Way to joke about it and not strangle said child. Way to keep your cool...yet another child saved from therapy by a mother who blogs.

Jill said...

Fabulous! Loved the post and insiteful information. Thank you for experiencing it so I don't have to :)