I'm hoping this comes across the right way. I've seen lots of posts on this and thought I would add my two cents.
So I love blogging. As I admitted in a previous post, I have an addictive personality and get sucked into things (cookies, books) to the abandonment of others. I hate to admit it, but I had days (not lots, Mom and Dad, just some) where THIS was taking way too much of my precious time. Many of you know what I'm talking about and I began wrestling with all the things in my life that seem good, but maybe not best (see Dallin H. Oaks talk of Oct. 2007). Like lots of babysitting trades, helping in classrooms, signing up for cooking the ham for the Christmas party, like making applesauce, like my books, like my TV shows, like my exercising, like my blogging.
So I decided to fast and pray about it. And I didn't want to, because I didn't want to do my life any other way (even though it wasn't working ...ever happen to you?). So in my prayers, I included a plea that I would be more happy and willing to submit...that I would WANT to change the order of things if that's what He thought was best.
I had lots of prompts to get me to this place:
Gift from the Sea recommended by a fellow blogger,
feeling generally yucky on days when I was so in a thousand places (mentally and physically),
Julie Beck's Mothers who Know talk,
kids who complained
and I finally stopped ignoring them.
So these are some Answers I got and that are working for me.
1. I remembered (during a prayer, of course) a talk my saintly sister-in-law had given, in which she discusses a Primary Sharing Time she witnessed:
The teacher had an empty jar sitting on the table. Next to the jar were two bowls. One was filled with walnuts and the other one was filled with sand. The walnuts represented those things we do to serve the Lord such as going to church, paying tithing, going to the temple, home teaching and visiting teaching, doing missionary work and so forth. The sand represented those things we do for our self such as the jobs we may have, relationships with family and friends, goals we desire, school, vacations, sports and activities that we participate in and on and on.
The teacher wanted to see if all of the sand and nuts could be contained in this one jar. She began by pouring the sand into the jar. It filled the jar about half way. She then took the walnuts and poured them on top of the sand, but in doing so it caused the walnuts to spill over the jar.
Because that didn’t work she then reversed the process by putting the walnuts (or things we do to serve the Lord) into the jar first. At a first look, the walnuts took up a good part of the jar. It made you wonder if there would really be room for the sand. She then poured the sand (or our personal desires) over the walnuts. Guess what happened? This time, both the walnuts and sand fit into the jar, and there was even a little room at the top to spare. Even with the walnuts filling up most of the jar, there was still room for all of the sand.
When put in first, the walnuts then dictated where there was room for the sand to be. It all fit together perfectly. Being a visual learner, it was so powerful for me to see how to make it all fit, and if reversed in process how it doesn’t fit.
Now there are some times in our life where we might have lots of sand- maybe even too much sand. Yet, it all seems like good things to us, so how do we decide how much or what part of the sand to get rid of.
I realized that I needed to figure out what my walnuts were and to do them first. I think they are individual but these are mine: a good morning prayer, scripture study, religious/inspiring literature (right now A Quiet Heart by Pat Holland), and 10 minutes alone with each child.
As I have tried to do those things first (and succeeded almost every day) ...guess what? I don't feel guilty about the blogging, or the extracurricular activities, or even the TV watching! And also guess what? I have truly truly had more time to do all the things in my life. The sand is fitting it (with room to spare). It's always humbling to realize that when we do things Heavenly Father's way, it all works so much better!
2. I set a timer on my blogging...an hour a day and I try not to do it with kids around.
3. I pay attention (and pray for extra loud promptings) to how I feel as I complete the activities of my day. Making applesauce? Felt wonderful after good conversation and something to show for it. Helping in the kid's classroom? Felt great after observing Gabe in school and interacting with his classmates and teacher. Going over my time limit? Oh, whoops, only thing I felt yucky about all day.
So sorry that's long. Hope it's helpful, or meaningful. I'd love your feedback.
I know Heavenly Father answers our prayers and wants us to have fun and fulfillment in our lives. I know He will show us the best way when we humbly seek and follow His direction. Good luck in your search for the Best!
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