Monday, February 18, 2008

MONSTER JAM

Everything is bigger at Monster Jam.

Big Idea:
George (my brother-in-law's brother-in-law) came up with the idea of taking the boys out for some wicked thrills. So George, Kevin (my brother-in-law) and I got tickets for us and our sons. (Seth was unwittingly omitted from the fun so that it might actually be fun).

Big Disappointment:
My 12-year-old nephew Austin lost the privilege of attending Monster Jam (MJ) due to an "energy draining" (see Love and Logic for definition) fight that he had with his brother. So his seat was passed onto his sister Mallory who did her best to fit in with the all male crew by sporting pink camo's.



Big Questions:
On the way over to meet up with everyone, Gabe had some intriguing questions that required deep thought, "Dad ... would you rather be able to 1.) control the weather, 2.) have a BB gun (thoughtful pause) that you can take anywhere you want, or 3.) be able to turn into anyone or anything?" I was a little suprised that owning a BB gun ranked up there with X-men/Heroes powers. I guess a seven year old doesn't realize that if you had either of the other powers, you could probably procure a BB gun as well.

Big Noise:
Having never been to a MJ before, I wasn't prepared for the amount of noise these trucks could make. I got worried when we sat down behind these two 10-year-olds who obviously knew their way around monster trucks a lot better than I did.


This is how Gabe and I enjoyed MJ.


Big Tricks:
Our favorite part of MJ were the big tricks. We loved the Evel Knievel stunts.


Big-Time Patriotism:
As we walked into the arena, the booming anouncer voice bellowed ... "Do you love America?" "Well, yeah" I thought to myself "I do."
(Booming Announcer Voice) "Lets hear it for the men and women of our Emergency Services!"
(**Crowd cheers wildly**)
(Booming Announcer Voice) "Lets hear it for the men and women of the Fire Department!"
(**Crowd cheers wildly**)
(Booming Announcer Voice) "Lets hear it for the men and women of the Police Department!"
(**Crowd cheers wildly**)
(Booming Announcer Voice) "Lets hear it for the men and women of the Armed Services!"
(**Crowd cheers wildly**)
(Booming Announcer Voice) "Lets hear it for the men and women of the ARMY!"
(**Crowd cheers wildly**)
(Booming Announcer Voice) "Lets hear it for the men and women of the NAVY!"
(**Crowd cheers wildly**)
(Booming Announcer Voice) "Lets hear it for the men and women of the AIR FORCE!"
(**Crowd cheers wildly**)
(Low Manly Announcer Voice) "Lets hear it for the men and women of the MARINES!"
(**Crowd cheers wildly**)

Honestly, I am grateful for all these public servants, but about halfway through our armed services I was feeling guilty because I couldn't muster any more enthusiasm. Sorry Marine dudes ... I just got tired. I guess that is why I am an engineer and not a Marine.


(Here are "The Patriot" and "Captain USA" making serious tracks around the arena - Note how even the smash-em-up cars are spray painted Red, White and Blue)
Big Ending:
Okay, there is none. I've lost all typing enthusiasm, too.

21 comments:

Lauren in GA said...

Seeing those 2 ten year olds with those sound blocking ear muff thingies would really have striken fear in my heart.(aren't those the ear protection things people use at a shooting range?)

Great job to you,and the other dads for taking your sons and Mallory to such a memorable evening. Great job to Mallory, too for sportin' the pink camo.

Lauren in GA said...

I meant, "stricken". Sorry, I need some sleep.

♥Shally said...

My son would LOVE to go to a Monster Truck Jam! Instead, he is being roped into going to Disney Princesses on Ice.

Poor kid.

Ashley said...

I would like to add: BIG RED FLAG when a guy asks you out on a date & wants to take you to the MJ. Isn't that a little like taking sand to the beach? Doesn't he want to look at all the "F-Chicks" w/o another girl being there?

bloggingchristy said...

And I thought us Texans were all white trash. Watch out for those Spokanians.

At least you didn't have the headphone earplugs to prove you had never really been to a MJ before.

Malls, I love pink camos, I just can't find any in Women's sizes!

Melinda said...

Looks as fun as it was here in Salt Lake!! Ben did have the advantage of ear plugs so he could enjoy it with his hands free to wave a flag!

Rochelleht said...

ha ha ha ha ha

jessica said...

Hey Ryan, the next time you find yourself with an extra Monster Jam ticket, you should give Aric a call. The poor guy will never have the opportunity to man-it-up at a MJ being the father of two very girly girls...he gets to be tortured at Disney Princesses on Ice.

jessica said...

Hey Ryan, the next time you find yourself with an extra Monster Jam ticket, you should give Aric a call. The poor guy will never have the opportunity to man-it-up at a MJ being the father of two very girly girls...he gets to be tortured at Disney Princesses on Ice.

Elizabeth Caldwell said...

Well that sounded like fun. I'm just glad that my John is super sensitive to sound and so we don't have to go... LOL

I look forward to reading about your evening out with the girls at the father daughter dance... you do have your tickets don't you???

Lindsey said...

Ut oh, our lives are starting to eerily collide! We were at the monster truck jam too! We had a great time. I put some video of one of the trucks on my blog, cuz, I just don't think you can truly appreciate the noise without being there. :)

Jacki said...

YES! Everyone needs to make it to a MONSTER JAM rally in their lifetime.

I tell you though, there is something about a MONSTER JAM held in the dirrrty, diiirrrtty... South that is. When you mustard up the courage to go to another MONSTER JAM, head down here. You will pay more attention to the people than the trucks, but it is all in good fun!

the wrath of khandrea said...

you had me at "Love and Logic..."

Bridget said...

We went to a Monster Jam in Utah many years ago. I think my ears were ringing for 3 weeks afterward. We wanted to take our boys to it here in Portland a few weeks ago but they didn't have a Saturday matinee, only Sunday. If I'm going to break the Sabbath it will be for something a little less white trash than a MJ.

Anonymous said...

loved ready that post... sorry marines...

Mine would love monster jam as well... but hey, dad works and mom ... well ... doesn't think that sounds like fun.

ha.

and I'm in charge.

Celia Fae said...

Ooooh. I liked the pretty font colors. And the part about the kid who didn't get to go. Your family is great at discipline.

Get the boy a bb gun already. I bet you had one.

Stacy said...

Ryan - I took Tyler and Adam to a Monster Truck "event" once (and I mean once)about 4 years ago. I went with a group of 6 fathers and their 15 or so sons. I was clued in about the earplugs - in fact - since we parked at my office and walked over to the Bank One Ballpark, I even provided earplugs for the whole crew out of our shop supplies. I only provided the little earplugs that fit right in your ears, not the big over-the-ear type (I did see quite a few of the big ones, though). Anyway, about hours into the "event" (but I swear it felt like 12 hours), I looked over at Adam and Tyler and they were asleep. I made a solemn vow then and there that I would never go to another monster truck event again. There was still about and hour left and I couldn't leave early because everyones' cars were locked up in my company's lot. Needless to say, when I was invited the next year and the year after that, and the year after that I declined the invitation - Cade

Ilene said...

Seth can come over to our house and use our bb gun. Dan likes to aim it at barking dogs. Don't live next to us if you have a dog that barks or poops on our lawn.

Hollyween said...

I so do not enjoy these Monster Truck Jams. Oh, wait... are they the same as those demolition derbys? Maybe it's THOSE I don't like. In any case, glad you had fun! Bring some ear phones next time.

Meghann said...

That was hilarious seeing the two boys with ear muffs. As always, your post totally made me laugh Ryan.
Speaking of "energy draining," we need some serious energy restoration tips. Any ideas?

Adrianne said...

I love that the seeley boys slept during the monster truck event. I think Gabe's face shows sleeping might be the better option as well.