Oh, Checkin' it WAY more than twice

Because Stie was kind enough to expose her neuroses, at my request, I thought I'd let you all in on a little Jessica secret. I'm obsessed with list making. See the picture above? Lists from last Saturday...all in use. I took a picture and thought I'd make a list to tell you all about it.

1. The types of Lists you'll find lying around my house:

• To-Do List--the most important. Has all tasks (mostly in order) of the day, plus things I add during the day, knowing I won't get to them, but don't want to forget.
• Calorie List--found on the back of the to-do list. Usually left incomplete when the calorie allotment begin to look hopelessly too small.
• Positive/Negative List--also on the back of the to-do list. I'll pick a kid (usually Emma) and track how many happy and not-so happy interactions I have with her during the day. Of course, we have LOTS more Positive interactions when I'm tracking. Which is the whole point.
• Grocery List on the Fridge--this is the list with all the food I realize we are out of during the week. Not the master shopping list.
• Master Shopping List, with Daily Menu List in right corner--made on grocery day. Menu saved and magnet-ed on fridge.
• Idea for Blogs
• Big Events list--this is the page or two I start making to prepare for Christmas or trips or Girls camp. Luckily I only have to bring these babies out once in a while.

2. Stuff on Today's List (in order):

• scrips
• 10 min E
• 10 min G
• 10 min J
• 10 min S
• school (getting them out the door deserves crossing off, as does:)
• dress all
• run
• Daines (watching niece and nephew)
• Cyn card (write b-day card to friend)
• McD
• Genie/frame (involves Christmas presents, don't look parentals!)
• plane ticket (for weekend with Paige, Tammy and Adrianne)
• blog (CHECK!)
• ham (for tonight's ward party)
• 2nd day
• practice Kara (for song E and I are singing tonight)
• Chr party
• adhere 3 (shorthand involving that STUPID Christmas card)
• stamp/cut (ditto)
• tie on (ditto)

3. Reasons I make lists

• I have 4 children, a husband, a house, a calling, a blog, friends...I couldn't possibly keep all my stuff in my head without the list(s).
• I feel so happy when I cross something off.
• I feel much more in control, when I can SEE it.
• It reminds me (the 10 min kid thing) of stuff I would let slip away otherwise.
• I have to think less, because it's all right there.

4. Therapists who have told me to stop making lists

• BYU therapist
• Dr. Scott at LDS Social Services
• Ryan
  (except this was years ago, and I've really learned how to not obsess about not crossing everything off. I did stop for about 2 years and it really helped. I am able to do it now and have it help, not hinder my life)

So go ahead: comment about how exhausting this all seems, or OCD, or how you are exactly like this and you love it. Comments...they're almost like a list, you know.

What Not to Wear

Everyone headed outside to play in snow... So Seth decided to get dressed and go with them.

ATTEMPT #1:

Um, no. Let's try again.

(Please note the shoes, and bare everything, and hat.)

ATTEMPT #2:

You might need some limbs free to play? Or some pants?

ATTEMPT #3:

Pants appropriate for snoozing, shoes appropriate for sand. Nothing appropriate for snow.

But he'd forgotten at this point what he was dressing for, so it didn't really matter. It sure made for a fun half hour for mom, though.

Ryan's not going to like this...

but here are the recipes from the cookie plate. They are seriously all so yummy.

Romney Fudge (also the fudge on the back of the Marshmallow Creme jar)

3/4 c. butter
3 c. sugar
2/3 c. evaporated milk

Bring these to a boil on medium. Stir and boil for 5 minutes.

12 oz package semi-sweet chocolate chips
1 jar Marshmallow creme
1 t. vanilla
1 c. nuts (I use pecans, because Ryan doesn't like walnuts...but walnuts are good!)

Take the pot off of the burner and add these ingredients. Stir until very combined. Pour into 9X13 and freeze (covered) until ready to serve.

Spritz--kind of like sugar cookies, but crisper

1 1/2 c. margarine (softened)

1 1/2 c. sugar

1 egg

1 t. vanilla

1 t. baking powder

3 3/4 c. flour

Mix all ingredients together. Get out a cookie press (see this link to see what I'm talking about). Press out your cookies and sprinkle with colored sprinkles. bake at 375 degrees for 7-10 minuntes. Makes 100 cookies, easy.

Christmas Crumb Bars--everyone's favorite, it seems. Tons of compliments this year.


1 lb. butter, softened
2 1/2 c. sugar
2 t. vanilla
1/2 t. Almond extract
2 t. baking powder
2 eggs
6 c. flour (divided)
about 20 oz. jar cherry jam (you could use other sour jams: raspberry, plum, currant but don't.)

Mix all ingredients except flour and jam. Add flour one cup at a time (roughly 5 c. ), until heavy and beginning to pull away from sides of bowl. Pat about 3/4 of the dough into a large cookie sheets (with sides), forming a crust around edges so jam doesn't leak out. Spread with jam. Add another cup or so of flour to make remaining dough really crumbly. Crumble it over the jam, then bake for 30 minutes at 350 degrees. Cool and cut into bars.


Chocolate Peanut Butter Cup Cookies--so good.

Click on this link to go to the Allrecipes.com for the recipe. Read the reviews...I always do. My only advice: do not overcook (it's hard to tell, because they are brown cookies).

And PLEASE...if you make these, or have made anything else I've suggested: LET ME KNOW. I would love to hear if you've made them and liked them!

Quick Quote #17

To pass the time, Ryan was asking the kids what Christmas traditions they'd like to incorporate this year. Gabe had a great idea. He said he'd "always wanted to try Hanukkah." L'Chaim!

He's pictured here, last Christmas...not in a yarmulkah. Sorry.

Husband Knows Best

I have been so slammed with work and well, work that I have barely had time for the necessities. Today, I finally exited the haze and had a look around. I was horrified with what has happened to my blog. Just looking at the most recent spat of comments brought tears to my eyes. The weepiness was on account of the estrogen that drooled over my mouse-hand as I clicked on the link. I have abandoned my post for too long and as a result, I have a choice to make. I can either change the blog colors to lavender text on a powder pink background, or I can re-stake my territory. Don't worry this will not involve urinating around the perimeter (some one out there must have seen Never Cry Wolf ... what am I saying?!? A movie about a man fighting to survive alone in the wild, probably not).

So here is how we roll ... I will post a male perspective on recent happenings and no one will add comments that involve any of the following:

• Recent or impending purchases
• Baking or recipes
• How skinny any blog participant may look
• Anything to do with fingernails or toenails unless it indicates how they can be effectively employed as a weapon
• Communal encouragement of any kind

Until we all learn to follow these rules, Jessica will be banned from adding to the blog. Okay seriously though, you will be peppered with annoyingly non-female posts

So let's begin - shall we?

#1 - On Saturday Jane was crying too much. Finally she began to cry about losing in hide and go seek. So what is a father to do to resolve this dilemma? Easy - 3 words. "Suck it up." I told her to suck it up and stop crying or stop playing the game. This all happened just as Jessica was breaking in the new babysitter on the Romney routines. I could tell by the sideways glance I got from my wife that she was a bit embarrassed and wouldn't have chosen my method of instruction. I could tell by the big eyes on Jane that she either didn't quite understand the phrase or was a little concerned with the new sheriff in town. But guess what ... no more crying

#2 - If I wanted to I could torture my wife. I am not talking about run-of-the-mill annoying my wife (even though I have "skillz" in that arena as well). I am talking about Jack Bower style inflicted pain.

How would I do this? It would proceed as follows. Wait for her to be invited to do almost anything, go to lunch with a friend, attend a book club, participate in a baby shower, etc. (really any social gathering will do). Then I would orchestrate another group of her closest 25 friends to invite her to an alternate social activity for the exact same time. She cannot refrain from participating. She never could. So on Saturday she had already scheduled a "cook day" where she made 8 meals at the same time we were having family Christmas cookie day, which happened to be on the family house cleaning day. So when my sister called and informed me that she wanted to invite Jessica and Emma to her yearly holiday Nutcracker excursion, I knew just what to do. I politely declined on her behalf and told Heather that I would be sure to let Jessica know about the invitation. As promised, after all the baking was finished and the ballet was long since over I told Jessica about the invitation. "I wish I would have known" she lamented "I could have fit that in." "No you couldn't honey, I know you think you could, which is precisely why I shielded you from making the mistake of trying to" I informed her.

Unfortunately, my post does include references to baking, crying and ballet, but I think Jack Bower ought to cancel that out.

Sunday Summary

Stuff that happened this week:

Yearly Meaningful Ornaments on the Too-Small-Tree Tradition

In Ryan's family, they had a special tree. Each year they would add one ornament that represented the biggest thing that happened that year. We have continued that tradition and did it for FHE this week. This year's ornament was a big, beaded State of Texas representing our cruise (we left from Texas, sailed with all southerners and spent a few days visiting San Antonio). Really meaningful. (Usually it's a baby, or a move, or--for the first kid, but none of the others--first day of kindergarten, but thankfully this year was pretty quiet).

Ryan ditched me for an entire week.

He had a conference in San Jose and continued to work until the wee hours of the morning, while there. He assures me he is now done, but I don't believe him. I know some of you have husbands who leave a lot more, for a lot longer. My deepest condolences. I barely survived: I started crying when I got in the shower on Monday morning, after he had left and realized the hot water heater was not working. I'm NOT the kind of girl that fixes her hot water heater. Luckily, I have a neighbor who is. We had hot showers all week and Ryan got home on Friday. All is right with the world.

The Creche display.

We drove up to a stake center in the South part of Spokane and saw approximately 2000 nativities. It was very well done, the kids were enthralled (truly!), and we were glad we went. Seth, of course, found EVERY SINGLE nativity animal in the children's area and lined them all up on the nearest table:

The Rowell's Christmas party

Our next door neighbor hosted a fabulous party, where we all fought over some AWESOME ornaments and ate tons of food. We thought our ornament would outshine them all (an effigy of Homer Simpson tenderly embracing a can of "Duffs" beer larger than he was). To our chagrin, we were out-"classed" by our friends who found an overweight, buck-toothed, ethnically diverse showgirl complete with fishnets and a torn sequin dress. And then we got it stolen from us. Bummer.

We also played our famous "Name Game", except everyone left before the Charades round (our favorite) and so I proceeded to do my own charades of Elvis, Dwight Shrute and Shakira--Ryan guessed every one. I'm that good.

Baking Day

What better way to celebrate the birth of Savior than with 2 bags of sugar? Seriously. And 5 pounds of butter. We all totally felt the Spirit after sampling all day till we felt sick and squabbling over which of us had to go to the store to pick up more ribbon.

Okay, really, this is one of my favorite traditions and we had lots of help from the kids and enjoyed giving them to friends and neighbors. (The first paragraph was my sugar-hangover talking.)

I'm boring today. Maybe your comments can liven things up?

Doomed to repeat the sins of our mothers, uncles, whatever

The other day, as Emma and Gabe were adding something to our Nativity Advent Calendar (we have 4) I overheard this, through gritted teeth and with slitted eyes: "Ga-abe, you moved it!" Something in the ordering of the objects in the pockets, or on the scene, had been moved, and not to Emma's liking.

It took me back...

(Jessica 13, Matt 12 and Nate--with gold nose ring--5. Obviously the Three Wise Men, duh.)

When I was growing up, we had an advent calendar. It was a big felt Christmas tree, with 24 spots for the paper pictures that my mom had backed with felt and Velcro. Each night, as we put up the day's piece, my mom would read from a book that she had gotten with the original paper advent calendar. It would describe the meaning of each picture. There was an angel, a star, a donkey, all the usual pieces. The first day was a picture of swirly smoky darkness--symbolizing the darkness in the world before Christ was born. And this is where it all could go very wrong.

If this was the year that Matt (child #2, after me) went first...he would put the darkness at the top of the tree!!! Can you imagine anything so wrong?! I was able to appropriately influence the younger children and explain the sense in placing the darkness near the bottom, so that the star could be at the top, but Matt lived to irritate me. He would also not place the angel near the top--angels fly, right?so they need to be in the air-- and sometimes, ALMOST worse than the tree-topping darkness, he would not place the Mary, Joseph, Baby Jesus at the central place above the trunk. Slight blasphemy, no? I would carefully count which child would be in charge of which day and try to arrange the rotation so Matt would not have control over pivotal pictures, but sometimes he would sneak and change them. It made me so mad.

The following picture, I'm happy to say, shows the advent calendar in correct placement. It also shows me, circa 1988 wearing my awesome new Christmas sweater, tight jeans and big bangs (you're welcome).

So, when I heard Emma's frustration, I was amused and sympathetic, but didn't become involved. This is a battle she needs to fight on her own. I still have to squelch the need to "fix" the advent calendars, when I notice a camel in the little drummer boy's place, but I seem to have passed the torch.

And, Matt, should you ever come at Christmas time...stay away from my star. And Gabe. He's obviously doing just fine on his own.

Holiday Thoughts by Jane Romney

(Jane, in happier times...last Christmas morning)

1. "Is Christmas toomahwoh yet?" (Every day I get this question and I try to explain. We even have advent calendars to prove it. She just doesn't get it and often cries when I tell her no.)

2." Seth bettoh watch out for Santa cause he stoles stuff." (She was listening to "Santa Claus is Coming to Town" and got a little worried for Seth, due to the plastic bunny he pilfered when he was at a friend's house last week.)

3. "Why are you twirling the car like that, Mom?" (This comment happened after I turned the corner, IN THE SNOW, a teensy bit too fast.)

4. "I sink that Christmas is about to be cancelled cause aw da snow is melted." (We had a ton of snow, but it got rained out two days ago and she is deeply concerned.)

It takes all kinds

Varieties of Christmas cookies at the 2nd Annual Neighbor Christmas Cookie Exchange:

Candy Cane, Reindeer, Sugar, Peanut Butter and Chocolate Swirls, Fudge Marshmallow, Chocolate Chip, Lemon Raspberry, Gingersnaps and Oatmeal Raisin

Varieties of Neighbors at the 2nd Annual Neighbor Christmas Cookie Exchange:

The kind that lend you lemon juice when you need it for your Wassail, the kind that light your pilot light when your husband is gone, the underage kind that somehow do not spill any hot chocolate on your carpet, the kind that tell you all about their interesting adopting and then finding out they are pregnant story, the kind that make darling reindeer cookies and then send them along with their granddaughter after they are admitted to the hospital (!), the no-kid kind that still nicely put up with yours and, my favorite, the kind that sweep the floor after everyone leaves and then stays for a blogging tutorial.

Have I ever mentioned that I live in the most ideal neighborhood in the world?

Monday Summary

Sorry, about the Monday Summary. Little marital disagreement about how much blogging should be done on Sunday. (Didn't Pres. Kimball say we should journal on Sunday?but never mind...)
Emma had activity girls/achievement days? I can't ever remember which word goes with which...but she loves it and her leader is so gung-ho. This week they made those cookie ingredient/mason jar/sand art thing, except Emma's choice was snickerdoodle, which has only white, so it didn't look very arty, but will be yummy just the same. She was also mad at me because I did the tree without her (they were out playing in the snow). Apparently "it's my favorite part of Christmas" and now I've ruined the whole thing for her. Should I send her gifts back?

Gabe (and Emma) were forced by their mean mom to ride the bus home instead of walking on Friday (temperature high: 27 degrees). They walked in the door 1 hour and 15 minutes after school got out and angrily declared, "We're never riding that bus again!" Well, fine. Freeze your little fingers off. He informed us after church on Sunday that "I practically taught the whole lesson." I'm sure his teacher and classmates enjoyed that.


Jane is my little buddy, enthusiastically accompanying me to "bollyball", the library (where she and Seth fight over the stuffed giraffe and the handicap door opening buttons), the gym daycare (where she sits in a rocking chair and stairs at the movie for an hour), and "Wawmawt". She brightens the day, seriously, of everyone we encounter (except that poor giraffe). She just radiates joy. We're lucky to have her.

Seth has herpes. Nice. They are only on his leg, for some weird reason but it got me out of two babysitting trades and story time. Did I ever mention that he repeats himself? Well, it bears repeating. It goes on all day, and about all things and I seriously just say the same answer to him over and over, because I've learned trying to make him get it, is not actually the point.

Prepare to be jealous: After 3 hours of price comparisons and multiple list making via the Internet, I HAVE COMPLETED ALL CHILDREN'S GIFT BUYING. The shipping fees were so worth it. I also attended a way fun book club, with decorated stuffed Elephants (maybe Jane and Seth would have liked it), caramel corn and Sarsaparilla--all in honor of our book Water for Elephants.


This picture was taken last month. You can tell because it shows Ryan returning home from work...which he didn't do this week. Two midnight returns and one 2:45am return do not a happy wife (or husband) make. We are hoping it will all be done next week. We were happy to have him for the decorating on Saturday and for tithing settlement on Sunday (where the fasting Romneys could barely focus on the bishop's questions, due to his candy jar staring us, I mean, the kids in the face).

We're off to a fun winter/Christmas start and love having you around to tell about it!

Decking the Halls

The cost:

• 3 hours of house cleaning.
  
• 2 hours of Elmo videos.
  
• 3 hours of decorating.
  
• 1 hour of kids (rotating through) sitting on the not listening chair for various offenses (yelling, fighting, picking up breakable objects, not doing jobs, etc.)
  
• 1 hour of cleaning up the decorating-- (quote from Ryan: "The best thing about this fake tree is how it sheds just like a real tree!)
  
• 1 hour of Seth coming out from his nap and declaring, "I had a nice nap, Mom" when he'd never actually been sleeping.
  
• 42 hours (or something like that) of Christmas music. (Muppets singing "12 days of Christmas", anyone?)
  
• 1 1/2 hours of grocery list making and grocery buying.
  
• 1/2 hour of putting up outside lights in 23 degree weather.
  

The Pay-off:

1 clean, well-stocked, holiday spirited place to come home to.

Good, Better, Blog

I'm hoping this comes across the right way. I've seen lots of posts on this and thought I would add my two cents.

So I love blogging. As I admitted in a previous post, I have an addictive personality and get sucked into things (cookies, books) to the abandonment of others. I hate to admit it, but I had days (not lots, Mom and Dad, just some) where THIS was taking way too much of my precious time. Many of you know what I'm talking about and I began wrestling with all the things in my life that seem good, but maybe not best (see Dallin H. Oaks talk of Oct. 2007). Like lots of babysitting trades, helping in classrooms, signing up for cooking the ham for the Christmas party, like making applesauce, like my books, like my TV shows, like my exercising, like my blogging.

So I decided to fast and pray about it. And I didn't want to, because I didn't want to do my life any other way (even though it wasn't working ...ever happen to you?). So in my prayers, I included a plea that I would be more happy and willing to submit...that I would WANT to change the order of things if that's what He thought was best.

I had lots of prompts to get me to this place:

Gift from the Sea recommended by a fellow blogger,

feeling generally yucky on days when I was so in a thousand places (mentally and physically),

Julie Beck's Mothers who Know talk,

kids who complained

and I finally stopped ignoring them.

So these are some Answers I got and that are working for me.

1. I remembered (during a prayer, of course) a talk my saintly sister-in-law had given, in which she discusses a Primary Sharing Time she witnessed:

The teacher had an empty jar sitting on the table. Next to the jar were two bowls. One was filled with walnuts and the other one was filled with sand. The walnuts represented those things we do to serve the Lord such as going to church, paying tithing, going to the temple, home teaching and visiting teaching, doing missionary work and so forth. The sand represented those things we do for our self such as the jobs we may have, relationships with family and friends, goals we desire, school, vacations, sports and activities that we participate in and on and on.
The teacher wanted to see if all of the sand and nuts could be contained in this one jar. She began by pouring the sand into the jar. It filled the jar about half way. She then took the walnuts and poured them on top of the sand, but in doing so it caused the walnuts to spill over the jar.
Because that didn’t work she then reversed the process by putting the walnuts (or things we do to serve the Lord) into the jar first. At a first look, the walnuts took up a good part of the jar. It made you wonder if there would really be room for the sand. She then poured the sand (or our personal desires) over the walnuts. Guess what happened? This time, both the walnuts and sand fit into the jar, and there was even a little room at the top to spare. Even with the walnuts filling up most of the jar, there was still room for all of the sand.
When put in first, the walnuts then dictated where there was room for the sand to be. It all fit together perfectly. Being a visual learner, it was so powerful for me to see how to make it all fit, and if reversed in process how it doesn’t fit.
Now there are some times in our life where we might have lots of sand- maybe even too much sand. Yet, it all seems like good things to us, so how do we decide how much or what part of the sand to get rid of.

I realized that I needed to figure out what my walnuts were and to do them first. I think they are individual but these are mine: a good morning prayer, scripture study, religious/inspiring literature (right now A Quiet Heart by Pat Holland), and 10 minutes alone with each child.

As I have tried to do those things first (and succeeded almost every day) ...guess what? I don't feel guilty about the blogging, or the extracurricular activities, or even the TV watching! And also guess what? I have truly truly had more time to do all the things in my life. The sand is fitting it (with room to spare). It's always humbling to realize that when we do things Heavenly Father's way, it all works so much better!

2. I set a timer on my blogging...an hour a day and I try not to do it with kids around.

3. I pay attention (and pray for extra loud promptings) to how I feel as I complete the activities of my day. Making applesauce? Felt wonderful after good conversation and something to show for it. Helping in the kid's classroom? Felt great after observing Gabe in school and interacting with his classmates and teacher. Going over my time limit? Oh, whoops, only thing I felt yucky about all day.

So sorry that's long. Hope it's helpful, or meaningful. I'd love your feedback.

I know Heavenly Father answers our prayers and wants us to have fun and fulfillment in our lives. I know He will show us the best way when we humbly seek and follow His direction. Good luck in your search for the Best!