Tuesday, October 19, 2010

How Do You Like Them Pumpkins?

We headed up to the little farming community 20 miles away to take advantage of their fun harvest festivals.  It was a GORGEOUS fall day, we beat the crowds, every one was getting along.  I had $40 in my pocket.

(Life Lesson:  $40 is not enough money to budget for a morning at Greenbluff).

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The first farm was super fun—the kids did the cheap straw maze, petted ponies that were scary (to Faith at least), watched the Chunkin Punkin machine (a pumpkin gets hurled by an air gun a million feet, right before your very eyes).  We decided, in the interest of time, to forgo actually picking the pumpkin from the field and headed over to the our favorite farm.

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(Life Lesson:  if you must buy pumpkins at Greenbluff, pick them out of the field at Knapps, instead of waiting to purchase at Harvest House).

We headed over to the next destination, while visions of pumpkin donuts, haunted bouncy houses and caramel apples bounced in their heads.  We unloaded and the kids headed down to the “pumpkin patch”, while Ryan went to stand in the pumpkin donut line. 

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Everyone began to find the biggest pumpkin.  I began to worry about how much they would cost.  “Hey guys, It’s really annoying to carve a HUGE pumpkin, you know.  So many seeds, thick walls, etc.  You may want to find a medium sized one”.  Of course no one listened.  I pulled out my next tactic:  “Okay.  You may pick a pumpkin that YOU can transport to the cashier and to the car.  We are not getting a wagon.”  Everyone began rolling, kicking and bouncing their HUMONGOUS gourds over to the cashier.

(Life Lesson:  If you are worried about cost per pumpkin—just TELL THE KIDS THAT.  Don’t assume they can read between the lines and be persuaded to pick a little boring pumpkin over the glorious 20 lb monstrosity.)

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We plopped those big babies on the scale and the lady asks for $32 dollars! For 4 pumpkins.  I handed over ALL OF MY MONEY to the lady and said, in complete irritation: “Okay, guess we’re done.  I have no more money.  No play area, no caramel apples, no lunch.  You do, however, have pumpkins larger than baby elephants.”  Ryan returned with donuts to sad, mopey kids and an irritated wife.

(Life Lesson:  Pumpkin donuts can slightly elevate the mood of disappointed kids.  But not much.)

We drove home in silence.  I’m wishing I planned better and that the kids were better at catching my hints.  The kids are wishing their parents were richer and/or nicer and/or explained their options to them better. 

We stopped at McDonalds and buy a bunch of cheap food to take to Jane’s soccer game.  We sat down on the beautiful field and began to peel the Monopoly stickers off of our large fries and Big Macs.  Everyone started to cheer as we won lots of Free Medium Fries.

(Life Lesson:  While horrible for your body, apparently McDonalds and their gimmicks can do a lot to lighten the mood in the 5-11 year old crowd.)

Seth, upon hearing that we were getting Free Medium Fries, ran up to me and said “Hey MOM!  These must be the free medium fries.  See?  They aren’t huge and they aren’t tiny.”

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(Life Lesson:  Every mom needs a hilarious 5 year old to make her laugh when she is annoyed that her Big Plans went South.)

We ended up cheering Jane on, hanging out in the sun, admiring the leaves and the mountains and drove home contented.

(Life Lesson:  You do your best to be with your kids and, mostly, it all ends up okay.)

12 comments:

Cami said...

Alls well that ends well?

heidi said...

that's funny.glorious 20 lb monstrosity is on of my nicknames.

Carie said...

This really cracks me up. We have a great pumpkin farm close to our house that we have stopped going to because it was so expensive. Admission + games + all the pumpkins = no thanks. We just pick them up at the grocery store.

Now I really want a pumpkin donut.

the wrath of khandrea said...

we are heading to a patch next week. i feel relieved to have read this ahead of time, and hopeful that i can learn from your wisdom.

and though i may be sarcastic by nature, i seriously mean what i just said.

Lauren in GA said...

You may think that I am just saying this...but I really did learn from this.

I did think you had a good strategy in telling them that they had to carry their pumpkins. Too bad you have such physically strong and goal oriented kids.

I love your humor in times of frustration. I wish I could have been there to hear you paying for your baby elephants.

Rochelleht said...

UGH! I'm feeling the pressure now. I really need to get to the pumpkin patch. I can't believe October is half way over. Hmmmm... Maybe FHE next Monday??

Shopper Gal said...

Um at least you took your kiddos to the pumpkin patch. I'm such a cheap-y that we went to Albertson's! Watch out for my big ideas :)- HA
$7 for 2 pumpkins= Momma is happy

We did have a fun night carving them and Em made her pumpkin have glasses, like her! CUTE

At least you got some fries!! Those are so tasty!

Tristan said...

I need those life lessons! ;-) We are going to a patch Monday night for family night. Wish us luck!

Brooke Romney said...

Sounds like every "fun family excursion for us." Glad we are not alone!

J'net said...

Do u remember FISHING at Apple Hill? Jake CAUGHT the $32 fish...!!? BUT after thinking that he will NEVER be taken fishing in any other time of his life...
I consoled myself that the fishing pole, worm, location AND cleaning ALL inclusive was actually cheap!? AND no permit needed!
Enjoy carving those pumpkins, 'cuz NOW we don't buy them anymore, Jesse doesn't seem to care about it at 18... Thanx 4 sharing the FUN times w/ the rest of us!
$40 doesn't go as far as it USED to! Face painting was the big event up at Apple Hill!

Laurie said...

Your post titles have been really good lately. And, I'm just saying this: I think I'm over Halloween already.

Tammy said...

I love you for always being so honest and so real. Thats obviously why we've been friends forever!! I must say the things you worry about and the things I worry about could not be more different...but somehow I love hearing about your life and I'm sure mine amuses the heck out of you! xo